Trains and Natural Numbers
by Carico Diethel
Summary: Disjointed drabbles of mine that focus on White (Touko for many) and N, following the idea of the two of them traveling post-B/W and well before B/W2. The first one is platonic, but whether or not I go into others may change the rating further along the line. If you see some big goofy M rating, then you know what's up.


When it branches off into summer, you never really expect for the hot days and the colder days to alternate back and forth. You just want it to go from drafty to hot so gradually that you don't really notice it coming at all. One day it's cool, the next is warm and the last day is hotter, but no. You get one surprisingly warm afternoon with sweat on the back of your neck, and the next day you're wearing a goddamn pullover. Such is spring, such is yadda yadda.

I stepped outside and was immediately hit by the nippy air of the nighttime. It was warm enough, just wasn't expecting it. It really felt nice as I took my first few steps, and as I headed away from the inn, I decided I was going to regret going back through that chilly threshold to sleep due to the air conditioning. If I had stayed inside, I wouldn't have felt discontent at all, but I wouldn't have spotted a certain someone either.

As suspected, he didn't go very far.

Spotting N wasn't difficult. I saw the guy straight away, sitting just beneath the blaring lampost and staring out into the water. The light overcasting him versus the darkness that was three o' clock in the morning made him look a little too baroque. As for the moon and everything, it wasn't very bright outside as I approached him at the dock, and I was a little disappointed. We were in a city so the starscape wasn't what I would call grandois, but the smooth whirring of the ocean made up for its lack of dazzling reflection.

I didn't say anything, but he turned his head towards me, his eyes on the ground. He was still upset, but I was pleased that he wasn't making an overzelaous fuss about it. A couple hours of reflection sure did the trick, methinks, but I kept quiet. I walked up a few feet behing him and I stared out over the railing and into the horizon, leagues and leagues beyond the little boats that knocked against the side of the dock. I took off my hat and hooked the plastic strap on the back with my index and middle fingers, dangling it.

"So, what do you think?" He spoke first, but I didn't really register it at first because of that quick spill he calls a speech pattern. He didn't quite slur, but I hesitated.

"I dunno."

I listened to the ocean.

"I don't think your dad entirely meant what he said."

Rotating his hip and moving a leg out, he looked over at me. The muscles around his eyes looked abused by the lack of sleep he must have gotten in the past few weeks overall. I don't think he's all that used to staying up to this ungodly hour. Proper sleep was one of those things he probably never grew out of. His mouth was shut.

"If he's as smart as you say he is, and I'm not going to disagree for no reason, then his brainwa— well, scenario and meticulous planning just doesn't hold water." A breath. "Unless it's been a familial thing. He probably went through it too, somewhat. I'm guessing he can't really talk to Pokemon and sense their feelings like you can."

"The stone never did react to him." He explained, his eyes went upward casually. I don't think N minded my spitting out the obvious a little. He sure didn't look strained, but I don't think he was really out to make a point and, rather, wanted for me to just keep talking.

"Otherwise, I think that this passionate plan to take over everything would have been followed up by a publicity stunt ages ago with a crown over his head and not yours. I think it was scapegoating. "

"Well, it was my responsibility. Every one of us let him down, and I know it was awful for him." His chin met his knees. "I may not have been the 'last straw' or anything, but my losing was a very sour blow to all of us."

"Not just you, he was probably just disappointed in the entire circumstance."

N went quiet, his lips pursed just a little and were probably looking for the right words to spit out.

"It wasn't your fault, you know."

"It wasn't yours, either."

His thumb graced over his right hand over the soft spots of his palm, and he started pulling on his thumb. "I don't want you to think that his upsetness at me was something you instigated." Bet he was trying to crack his finger. I smiled, but I wasn't going to tell him that I never considered that for a second, but it did make me think.

"He had to do a lot of work. Pulled a lot of strings to make sure everyone was where he or she needed to be. It's probably the only way someone like me made it so far. The way society works with all of these people. It kind of made me really nervous that people can be so casual. It's all fast-paced, and yet people tell me I need to slow down."

He leaned back, and put his hands on the concrete. He scooted his pelvis forward and kicked his feet over the edge of the dock and let them hang over. Up went his arms through black railing, resting them on the bottom bar and N leaned forward again. Despite his feeling better, the demeanor was kind of disappointing and I felt terrible for him.

"… Like when I speak and whatnot. I bet you know this already, but I remember getting so riled and angry when people responded so negatively. I understand having doubts, but I still think Team Plasma was out to do the right thing. I mean, we really were!"

Besides being a shut in, he was raised around very nice people, or he wouldn't feel this bad and I know it. I looked away from him and stared blankly outward, but lowering my head again, N had dipped his cap over his face somewhat and a slight, disheartening shadow cast over his eyes. His nose too, and that stark contrast of the light made the rest of his face look so pale in comparison. The edge of his cheek, to his jaw where the light managed to catch a little better, were still a tad colorless thanks to his complexion.

"I just didn't want to disappoint him."

I didnt say much- had nothing to reply with. I went quiet and I thought for a long time.

I think now that his father couldn't have laid a hand on him or verbally abused him. There were two valid reactions I could think of straight away:

Numero uno. N would stray away from the ultimate goal, but I don't really know if Ghetsis breathed this sort of thing.

So no. Eight-six thousand, four hundred minutes, and how many years… and I feel like the train set and the model plane whirring about in his room were one indication that everyone around the kid was concerned for him- cared about his mental wellbeing and all that.

Granted, honing in on roadkill and giving him bruised and beaten Pokemon to grow up with doesn't support that either, but I feel like the day is just too long to focus on changing the world. I mean, that's pretty cute, and all, but still. _All Naturale_ really sticks up for himself and what he does, and even though he doesn't really talk about his father very much on his own accord, he doesn't seem to resent the guy either.

Then there's Option 2. N could take it as an inherant, human evil.

Which has its own emphasis to the whole Plasma ultimatum, by the by, but I feel like that is just so… so flawlessly perfect and would be doomed to failure. Here's a thought: N thinks I'm different. So one man's behaviors have no proper representation of a whole. I figure that, after some time, he'd have to give up on the pure heart or the sound mind if he was going to believe that only Ghetsis was natively good and humanity was on the brink of going sour outside of that fact.

It's not like he's a mysanthropist or anything. Separate, but equal. I guess that's the point I'm trying to make here.

Whatever the case, maybe it was the overshadowing lack of abrasion all his life that bothers him now. If anything, maybe he was a little too neglected to take that sort of miserable reaction well.

_Warped_, the man said.

And maybe a little warped Natural was. I saw his heart break right there and then that day.

That morning, he said he had to talk to me. He told me to reach out for my dreams. Ironic that he had to step on the back of the legendary beast that morning and fly some nameless distance out of proximity. My feelings were feeble and meek then.

"I'm sorry I said that." I looked at him. "Earlier, I mean. That's what I'm trying to say."

I keep my mouth closed, but pity and a child's heart, I say. My mind was going in the wrong direction. I have to get that morning out of my head, but the way the bland white light shines over his shirt reminds me of the sunlight against him as he stepped onto Reshiram's back and said goodbye to me. I wrapped my ring and pinky fingers around the plastic strap of my ballcap, fearing a little that I'd drop it somehow. He looked up at me now and swallowed some air.

"White?"

I didn't respond to him, but I rested my arms on the railing and hunched over a bit. I looked at him from over the side of my arm. My guess is he was paying a little bit of attention to my hat as it was hanging about.

"It's fine, really." He tipped his own hat back up. I don't think he realized that it was still a little too low for me to see him properly, because his eyes were a little bigger and somewhat apologetic and relaxed over the mishap. "I was misbehaving."

I grimaced, since it was kind of a lousy word to be honest. It made him seem awfully young, but the voice of a man that was just old enough to drink sounds conflictive and unnattractive with, "misbehaving." On the other hand, it was also rather mature and… humble sounding? I shook my head.

"Don't worry about it."

N scooted from the edge of the concrete and out from under the bar, pulling on the railing slowly as to get back up on his feet. He exhaled a little roughly- tiresome, for sure. I looked over at the hotel just beyond him, started drifting my eyes along the outline of his feathery hair. I think he looked at me, but I didn't make real eye contact with him 'till he put his hands on the railing to look out at the water.

I glanced at his shoulder a bit and turned to my left. The direction in which N was facing and the softest little breeze was coming from, it was the kind you could feel against your skin really well. Only the denim frays from my shorts and the strayest of hairs on my head were moved by it. Small locks flickered on N's face like bristles, pinched between my fingers. I didn't stare, but I wanted to. One of those moments where I think I made the right decision and was actually glad for coming out to talk to N after some time for each of us to think. If I had come out sooner, he could have still been very disheartened and I wouldn't have been able to see him like this.

He graced his fingers down the sleeve of his white shirt and tugged at the hem of it, straightening the fabric.

"You'll always be my buddy, you know."

He looked at me after I said it. I know he did.

I didn't smile. I was concentrating on the edge of his sleeve where his thumb and index finger were just a moment ago. At his height, it might have looked like I was a little downcast. I took a deep breath through my nose before turning my head out towards the ocean again.

A step toward me clicked in my ears and I felt his arm brush against my back. I looked to my left and saw his hand hover next to my shoulder; He wrapped his other arm around to meet it.

My right shoulder felt warm against his chest, but his hands themselves were ever so slightly chill in comparison. I don't think he knew what to do with his head, so I turned and gave him soft hug around the ribcage. My cheek was in that crevice between his torso and his arm, threads of the fabric feeling particularly soft, but then I recalled the black sweater he wears underneath. I didn't really hear him breathe either, just the rustling of fabric as he gave me what I think was our first hug throughout the course of our entire friendship.

I almost said something about him going away and not to do that sort of thing anymore, but didn't have it in me to actually open my mouth about it. I just stood there with my temple against his arm and I thought about things. A lot of it was nothing, but I remember some of it. I remember that thought about wood.

To warp something, you have to soak it in water and weigh it down. You weigh it down and wait. By the time it dries, the wood will have bent, completely.

And as far as I'm aware, you will never be able to fix a piece of wood and make it lie perfectly straight again, right?

He exhaled, and I think it was laced with bits and pieces of a yawn, but he didn't want to do so with his mouth wide open, I think. We both stepped out of the hug and he put his hand on his chin. "Excuse me there. It has been been a rather long day, don't you think?"

"Talk about going past curfew at three in the damn morning."

"Is it really?" He raised his brow and his mouth was just a little cracked open in surprise.

"Hell yeah it is." I covered my mouth as I yawned. I took my hand down and I smiled too. "We should go get some sleep before we both go rigid and die or something."

N drowsily let his head nod off, battering his eyes and I simply smirked.


End file.
